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Monday, December 18, 2006

The END of "Wussy Guy" Syndrome

It fills my heart with utmost JOY and Celebration to see this dreaded "plague" finally on it's way to come to an END.

What's that??? You haven't heard of any disease ravaging mankind you say?? You're not aware of any such happenings???

No matter,,it's not a disease that ravages all mankind. It only ravages the male-kind. And this disease is called -


That's right.. This has been the scourge which has ripped through the urban male population like World War II in Europe and left only destruction and confusion.

What is this "Metrosexuality"??

According to , A metrosexual is defined as a dandyish narcissist in love with not only himself, but also his urban lifestyle; a straight man who is in touch with his feminine side.

That definition by itself is somewhat incomplete in that it does not elaborate on the "eccentricities" of the metro-sexual male who goes about expressing his new found "feminine side".

Let's see now..How metrosexuality is shown in the popular media.

1)A guy who wears pastel shades clothes and apparel,, EVEN PINK. Nothing too out of the normal there. Guys can experiment with offbeat colours as well for party occasions and stuff..But PINK??? Please guys..PINK??? What's next for the new found "feminine side" in you?? Lingerie???

2)A guy who undertakes a skin care regime in order to be more,,,"urban fresh"( newspaper term, i have no idea what it means). Skin care for the metrosexual guy means facials, waxing, pedicure, manicure and the works. Now me being a guy,, i don't really go "neanderthal" with my skin either, especially not in winters. But my "skin care" starts with shaving and stops with applying moisturizer after a bath. Pedicure and Manicure for me is taking a nail clipper and running through my fingers and toes once in 15 days. THAT'S IT!!! Really guys,,where will it stop once we start down this path?? Are we going to see a guy and gal together where their idea of a 'date' is going to the salon together for a skin-care package??? YUCKKKKKK!!!!!

3)A guy who's not very strongly built with bulging muscles and has a rather gaunt frame - Yeesh man. That's all that the world required. Gaunt looking guys who compete with gals and cringe about extra fat on their tushies.

4)A guy who's in touch with his 'femimine side' - I guess that would mean talking like a GAY (ooohh Naughty...hahaha), CRYING (My Lord!!! Forgive them,,for they know not what they do) and other things i don't have the stomach to write about.

It's funny though. When this "metrosexual" fad started and caught popular media attention, newspapers and youth shows TV were splattered with gals who were saying stuff like "Ooh,,,we like Guys who're in touch with their emotions..Who express them out like we girls do". Now is it only ME who sees the paradox in that statement. "Girls" and "express them out" DO NOT necessarily work in the same sentence. Not when guys know that getting girls to divulge any matter which is bothering them is harder than digging through a cement foundation with a solitary hand shovel. Now gals want the GUYS to do the same??? Thanks,,but no thanks!!!

Now what can we use as basis to state that this fad or trend is coming to an end??? Well,,for one,, media coverage suggesting that the Metrosexual guy is "PASSE" and the RETROsexual guy in "IN". I can't say that media coverage is 100% accurate or ahead of the curve,,but it's a promising sign.. Time guys behaved like GUYS and not GALS (I get enough of BOBBY DARLING on an hour of Bigg Boss thank you very much). Secondly,,everything in fashion and lifestyle is a cyclical phenomena. What's HOT today is COLD tomorrow and HOT again the next week so it's just a matter of time that this "metrosexual" male is gone for good.

AND i can't truly express by words how HAPPY i am for it.

If any of you might be wondering and itching to ask, Why does this bother ME so much if i'm not following the "Metrosexual' way of life anyway. Nothing direct let me assure you, it's just that i couldn't bear to see Guys losing what matters most to a guy - His Tough Guy persona. Ok forget Tough Guy persona,,A GUY persona atleast.

That's a wrap on my take on this uniquely and pathetically disturbing Urban Phenomena which thankfully is on it's way to the sphere of history(for now).

Comments, suggestions, commendations and flames all welcome......

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Tarangini said...

Too true! Damn, when your boyfriend's sckin care regime begins to cost more than yours, that's when it is time to leave him!!! Yes, we all agitated to encourage our men to bathe every now and then, but the raspberry infused hand lotion was the last straw as far as I am concerned!

Ramaa Iyer said...


Awesome blog..Think if some of your own clan shud peep in & go thru this.Booby Darling....ROTFL

Preethy said...

totally see your point, darth! If gender differences at the intellectual level were to be equalized..........gosh, that would be the end of the world!

Maybe the whole concept (as is the concept of certain women deriving joy in being labelled a 'tomboy') is taking the I-am-trying-to-understand-the-opposite-sex-better syndrome overboard.....

Sunmeet said...

hmmm not bad yaar........well written essay but totally and fully biased!!!

one probably gets the feeling that a couple of your close friends starting going over board with metrosexuality soooo much that u felt as if your own manhoood is threatened!!! :P
and now with the trend fading away...the guys around u are also not so keen on it..and u are overwhelmingly relieved!!!LOL!!!!!